Velvet Elvis & Jesus in Heaven

Someone I know please buy this. Thanks for the link Mikey.

If I were a Simpons character I would be...

"I don't want your pity."

Take the Simpsons quiz here.

Eighty Percent

Eighty percent is good for my psyche. If I'm better, faster, stronger, smarter then 80% of people I would be just fine. Why? Because 80% is enough to be proud of, but at the same time not enough to be cocky about. Why? Because you're better off than 4 out of 5. So you know someone who is better off than you which keeps your ego in check but at the same time it gives your something to strive for.

and off on a tangent...

Tripps: (otter) Tripps: I love it Tripps: (otter) Tripps: like raping a ferret Tripps: (otter) Tripps: (puke) Mark: and you would know Tripps: I stick them up my ass Tripps: fuck that gerbil shit Tripps: I need a ferret Tripps: grease 'em up a bit first Tripps: get 'em half way in and let'm squirm Tripps: dance my hairy little assplug dance!

That's PIMP...GMAIL I LOVE YOU.

"Google has quietly added a feature to its free email service that lets people import their address book contacts from rivals Yahoo, Microsoft and America Online. "

Not my day at all...

I left the lights on in my car. My battery is dead. I need a jump and I don't have cables. Update: Yay for 1 year free roadside assistance!

This is the way the world would be if the FCC had it's way....

"In 2002, one of their officers ticketed a wheelchair-bound cerebral palsy patient for cursing when he was unable to find a working elevator to leave a station."

Thank you Becki for getting me to smile during an otherwise shitty morning.

Geek Alert: Brains hardwired to underestimate own strength

"Human brains are wired to underestimate the amount of force exerted on other people, a study of 'tit-for-tat' experiments has revealed."

Happy Birthday Wil and welcome to Vegas!

"I'm going to moblog and audioblog from Vega$, so check them out if you need your WWdN fix while I'm gone."

Thong-wearing men arrested at Wal-Mart

"When asked why they were wearing thong underwear, one of the men said a friend 'triple-dog dared' them. They will not be prosecuted, authorities said."

w00t!

I went to high school with this girl. (NSFW)

people and patterns

I've noticed that people tend to live their lives in a pattern. I'm trying to break mine.

The Couch-to-5K Running Plan

GET OFF YOUR ASSES!

Vegas girls suck...

This pretty much sums up whats wrong with this town:

College kids press no. If your hair is long press no. If you are nice looking, over 29 and want to pamper me with the finer things press yes. THUGS press yes and forget all the rest!

As a HOTORNOT mod you're supposed to be unbaised. I'll be unbaised while my heads hung over a toilet puking up lunch. Windy and I discussed this. There is something profoundly wrong (for both sexes) about the dating scene in Vegas. There is a low girl:guy ratio in Vegas for our age group. Plus with Clark county having the highest teen pregnancy rate in the country, every girl here has a kid. Luckily for me, kids don't bother me but for everyone else, you're all fucked.

Experimental drug may act as aphrodisiac for women

misc ranting...

attention whores... scene whores... drama whores... actual whores I'm just sick and tired of them. I guess I'm pretty bad too though. I mean if anything I'm an ego whore. I don't know if that exists, but if it does, it's me. I need more male friends. I need to do a better job of retaining the ones I have. I need to spend more time alone.

Oh Gross...

The most digusting description of shit ever:

...the second one looked like an orgy of fat tapeworms that had been chewed on by some ogre.

Thank you Rabbit for that insightful little observation.

Busy

I've been busy. When things slow down after the first I'll be sure to update everyone. I'm not saying I won't post before then. I'm just saying I'm kinda busy and all my posts will be short and impersonal.

GOD DAMN IT'S HOT!

Coincidence?

New Survey: Pee?

Click the headline to vote.

God damn it...

So I blew up at my boss. I left. I'm going to go back and talk. I hope I still have a job. Update: I went back in and had a talk with another boss. He and I agreed I needed a vacation. I have all of this week off! It's great!

Off and Away

I have this undeniable urge to leave the country. No, I haven't broken any laws. I just want to see more of the world. I think it started last night, when I was watching Braveheart again. It was the first time I've watched it and didn't cry. I got teary eyed, but not a drop fell.

BMP/BWP

bootycall man pool: a group of guys that you're friends with that you call in for sexual favors.       I'm thinking "BMP" for short. Conversely, there should be a "BWP" as well.        

I'm going to hell...

It's so wrong, yet so funny.

bored

Blogger has a new "friendlier" blog posting interface. This allows html ignorant people the ability to post pictures and links and such.   It has such functions as:  

align left

 

align center

align right

 

It also has bold and italics.

 

Colors and lists as well

 

1. red
2. blue
3. green

 

Heh, boy am I bored.

Jerky Boys 24/7

Perhaps I've been asleep...

I've just noticed it's impossible to live in this town anymore. I can't afford an apartment by myself if I wanted one. A year ago I made less and still made enough to buy a house! Jesus H Christ! $800 for a 1 bedroom apartment? What the fuck do I look like a New Yorker?

Cameron Diaz Bondage Photo Shoot

Cache this Google! Fetch hits for me! Muahhaahahaha

Las Vegas and the NBA?

"With the lure of Las Vegas, Shaquille O'Neal and Dwyane Wade in Heat uniforms, and Michael Jordan in an ownership position, it would be problem for him to put together a major ownership group. Jordan would have a chance to run the first major-league sports franchise in Las Vegas. And what a draw that would be for players."

I'm such a narcissist.

Secret Smilies for Trillian

So uh.... I'm still alive.

Sorry I haven't posted. I've been busy.

Overkill or Justified?

"On Monday, U.S forces dropped two tonnes of bombs on a purported militant safe house in Fallujah, killing 15 members of one family, according to witnesses, and turning the building into a 10-metre-deep pit of sand and rubble."

Domain Complications

In case there are some issues with the site, you should still be able to hit it from Nlogger.com.

The Man from Seneca

"America, the greatest country in the history of humankind, is a sewer running straight to hell, and our most glorious days lie just ahead."

That is a catfish with a basketbal stuck in its mouth. Women everywhere are envious.

Gold Miner!

Interesting Quote

"'history will vouch that in many countries, his country cultured dictators like fish in hatcheries. ... [A] hundred years from now[, though], both Saddam and Bush are going to look the same, because both believed ... they were right, even though they were wrong.' "

Lindsay Lohan is so hot she make ME want to get fake boobs.

Russian Spies

Russian's version of the CIA paid a visit to my site today. That's kinda cool.

COPROLAGNIA

Today's word of the day.